Deputies Make A Grave Mistake is one of the Collectibles found in Alan Wake 2. It is one of the pages of the Return manuscript.
Transcript[]
"Hey! Stop right there!" The shape stumbled out of the dark toward Deputy Mulligan. Thornton was doubled over. Coughing. A chunk of cold pastrami caught in his throat.
"Bring it, fucker!" Mulligan fired. Thornton hacked the pastrami out of his windpipe. Opened fire with his partner.
The monster fell. They kept shooting. The thrill of domination. This was the Cult of the Tree. Not one tree, a forest. Secret knowledge in a deer mask. The last line of defense.
"Yippee ki-yay, motherfucker! Bright Falls' fucking finest!"
They crept over, pulling out their flashlights. The horror this was Monica from the tackle shop. An innocent woman. Thornton's pastrami came back up.
Location[]
This page can be found on the table behind the smiling Percolator cup in the Kalevala Knights Workshop.